I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
