Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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