At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
and you fell through a lawn chair
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
