google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
