I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I think I died a long time ago.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
