and you said cock pushups were impossible
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
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