Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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