There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Say something about gay babies.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
