you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
