The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
