At least make sure they are 18
Why
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
