we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
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