...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
