dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
