he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm way too hungover for life right now
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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