i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
