I'm gonna have a badass scar
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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