what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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