check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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