She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
