i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
