You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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