i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
