You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Two words: nipple clamps
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