Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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