You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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