they need to just BURY HIM!
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize