so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
