Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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