I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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