Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
