Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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