A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Blood and glitter go together right?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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