I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
