We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
