Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Is it because I queefed?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
