i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
