I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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