Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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