if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
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