i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize