I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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