you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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