please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
