i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
