Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
