I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
