this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
