So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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