haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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