Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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